Heyyyy
My reminder of Nothing Changes, if Nothing Changes
Oh heyyy!!! Welcome to our new page, where we are finally putting our thoughts and conversations down on a page. Thanks for joining our ongoing conversation as we discuss your mid-twenties, post-grad, moving, all the big life shifts of the defining decade (highly recommend this book if you have not read it!).
As my friends and I have scattered across the country (& abroad), beginning our careers, embarking on new adventures and new challenges, we have been finding ways to continue to stay in communications with each other. As far as Emma and I go, our deep conversations last til 2 am on the couch or our coffee walks turn into 9 mile deep discussions of what comes next-fueling our desire to find what motivates us in this world to what deep and personal connection looks like these days.
For all those in-between moments, how could we capture the deep conversations, with the life updates, the new learnings, the moments where we feel stuck? From our love of journaling, consuming podcasts, self-help books, and educating ourselves, we thought this would be the perfect place for us to dump our train of thoughts. Messy and unpolished, striving to move the needle towards “becoming” and letting our life unfold on the in between moments.
We are excited to share our trials and tribulations with you.
Nothing Changes, If Nothing Changes
I’m excited to see where all of this is going
2024 me sat down, and plotted all the things I wanted to do in the year 2025. I had a plethora of goals and ambitions, and I immediately set it upon myself to figure out how to make it happen. For the first time in my life, I had the realization that I was FULLY in control of the things in my life. That life didn’t happen to me-but I had the choice to make the life I wanted.
I decided that it was time for a reset, so I got to plotting. I opened up notion and set about envisioning what this year was gonna look like.
I wrote all the things I wanted to live for, strive for, work towards. I broke those goals down to figure out the plan to get there.
Wanted to move to a major city- How could I use my network to land a job there?
Wanted to learn to ski- who could I ask to borrow gear from so I could drive 2 hours up to Lake Tahoe to take lessons?
To try a Michelin star restaurant-Who could I invite to go with me SF?
For all these big and lofty goals, I broke them down to see what I could do every day to get there. From practicing hand stands in the gym with the help of my dad, to applying to 100’s of jobs and calling people that were friends of friends of friends to ask them about their careers and industries, I set out my mission to use the most of each and everyday.
I woke up at 4:30/5 am, went to my 3 jobs, worked out everyday, applied to at least 20-30 jobs a week, and nudge by nudge worked my way there.
wish list
I move to a new city where new relationships flourish and bloom
I land a “big girl” job and start my career
I travel and explore the world, to see my friends, new places, old places, and have new adventures that add to my story.
I have friends for life-maintaining old friendships but always expaninding my circle
I have financial security
I have true & loyal friends
Every month, I made it a habit to check in with where I was. How was I progressing, what could I do differently, do I want or need to reevlaute anything. I also am a big visulaer learner, so my love of Pinterest made a big return this year.
I started doing monthly “manifestation” boards. Prior to each month, I would think about what I wanted it to look like. What would I be doing, what would I be wearing, what did I need to be thinking about? Then I would start pinning all these pins that felt like the represented what I wanted that month to look like.
I wanted to learn to Ski —> Find some ski lifts
Maybe it was time to visit the beach —> find some beach inspo
Become a better cook, try some new bars, explore a diff city, etc.
These boards would be the inspiration behind the wallpaper that I would then create. Each month, I would use Pinterest to collage all the photos and quotes together to create a new mood and manifestation board that I would look at 500x over the course of the month. As a gentle reminder to keep working towards the small wins.
Now onto the Big Stuff
For me, my biggest thing I wanted to accomplish was to move to a major city. After graduating from UC Berkeley, I felt like I had to be doing BIG things with my life. I compared myself to my friends, people I followed on LinkedIn, and struggled to grasp with what this next purpose was gonna be for me.
My worth was no longer going to be defined by how fast I went back and forth in a pool. I saw high school acquaintances accomplishing big things, people living these grandiose lives and I felt stagnant. I didn’t have a career, I didn’t have a way out of what felt like a funk. I was living at home, working at my old jobs, and living in my small hometown feeling like nothing was progressing for me.
By the month of February, I had secured the first major milestone- a job that would be in NYC.
I immediately packed my bags, shipped my few belongings, moved in an apartment I nor my Facebook roommates had ever seen in person, across the country by myself.
I threw myself into my work, my social life, learning a new city, exploring a totally new environment.
The driving force behind all of this was my slogan for the year: “Nothing Changes, If Nothing Changes”.
I had this plastered in in my journal, on my notion boards, as my wallpaper, it was constantly running through my head. The idea that I would only see the same results if I kept the same habits. I was finally in a new space, and the world seemed so wide open. The opportunities seemed endless.
What I loved about this time period was the fact that I could walk outside my apartment, and for the next 12 hours I wouldn’t know what would happen next. Because the best part about living in New York is there are endless places to explore, and see, and do. I could spend my morning walking the WSH, then going to a Museum, grabbing coffee with a high school friend, going to a yoga class, ending up at a dinner party, and then going clubbing until 3 am, all in a day’s work. Life has so many possibilities if you just have the courage to step outside of your comfort zone and let the universe dictate where you go.
So as the year comes to a close, what would I do differently? Did I achieve everything I wanted? Am I proud of who I am becoming?
The short answer, nothing-no-yes. But only because I had the courage to be comfortable with change. To embrace the unknown. To step into conversations, social settings, jobs, cities, and everything in between as a stranger, as the newbie, as the girl that is gonna learn and figure it out.
My note to myself (and maybe to you) is to embrace the discomfort of the uneasy and the unknown. Life changes when you change your habits, your setting, your environment, and your ability to step outside your comfort zone. You are destined for great things when you seek the challenge that comes to step into the unknown. Take a deep breathe, because you don’t know how good it’s gonna get.
With love,
Mia